So Much More
by Oakenshield's Star
Summary: By helping a friend out causes Tilly to retreat from the others a little, when a joke that Kili said backfires. Everyone soon notices the change in her, most of all Fili and Thorin, who decides to help in his own way.


So Much More

I had been travelling with Thorin and his men for a while. It was Gandalf's idea to bring me, as he knew I could handle myself in any situation. I had known Gandalf for a very long time, since he was the one that found me unconscious in a cave.

It was time to repay Gandalf's kindness by accepting his offer, so here I was with thirteen dwarves, a hobbit and a wizard. I knew Gandalf wanted me on this quest for a reason, though he never revealed as to what that was.

The night was drawing in and I knew that everyone would soon set up camp for the night. Sure enough, I saw Thorin halt his brown pony before turning around and face everyone.

"We shall stay here tonight."

I gracefully got of my pony Rose (named after my mother) and tied her up with the rest of the ponies. I then stretch my limbs, before helping Bombur with the supper. I was completely unaware that someone was watching me intently.

o0o

Other than Gandalf, no one knew that I once lived on earth (well, as far as I was concerned), I was still trying to figure out how I ended up in Middle-earth, when I noticed Fili bending down in search for something. Being curious, I got up and went up to him.

"Have you lost something, Fili?" I asked him.

Fili glanced up and graced me with a smile.

"I lost my bead." He replied.

I instinctively got on my hands and knees, looking for his bead.

"Tilly, you don't have to help me." said Fili, staring at me.

Turning my head in his direction, I smile back at him.

"Oh hush, it will be quicker to look together. Four eyes are better than two, don't you think?"

Fili chuckles, nodding his head. We both combed the area, noticing a few snickering from the company, but I just ignored them, while continuing looking for Fili's bead. I knew what I was looking for, as Fili had shown his array of beads to me a few nights before.

The beads had the mark of Durin engraved on the silver beads and I knew they were very important to him. How Fili had lost one, I had no idea, but I didn't mind helping him look for his bead.

We were a little way from the rest of the company and still I had no luck in founding the bead. Just as I was about to ask how he was doing, Fili sighed, causing me to turn around and face him.

"At last, I've found it," grinned Fili, straightening himself out "Thank Mahal for that."

I tried to hold in my laughter, but it was proving difficult. Fili giving me a quizzical look really set me off.

"What's so funny?"

"You have leafs in your hair."

Looking around, I noticed many leafs fall from the trees. How he never realised they were in his hair, I'll never know. Fili watched me as he raised his right hand and started pulling out leafs from his hair. I stepped forward and helped him remove them, with a smile on my face. I realised that he had soft hair as I gently remove another leaf.

"You better tell Uncle Thorin." came a voice behind me, turning my head slightly, I saw Kili with a grin on his face "that you two are courting now."

"I'm sorry, what?" I reply, not quite understanding what he meant.

"Kili!" warned Fili, causing me to glance back at Fili.

"Well, she has to know our ways." continued Kili, his grin now showing his teeth.

"Will someone please explain what is going on?" I asked both brothers.

Kili starts laughing as I drop the last leaf from Fili's hair. I didn't find it that funny, so why was he laughing like an hyena?

"You have shown everyone that you are now together." said Kili, trying to control his laughter.

"But we are not," I pause looking from Kili to Fili with wide brown eyes "together."

"You touched his hair, meaning you have accepted him as your life mate."

"Life mate?" I raise my eyebrows while I suddenly look at the ground "All I did was help Fili remove lea-,"

"You best inform Uncle Thorin," cut in Kili "then after we reclaim Erebor, you too will get married and finally you'll be part of the family."

"Kili!" scolded Fili "Stop it!"

But I wasn't listening. I was stunned. I had no idea that touching a dwarves hair was a sign of being together. I was now mortified. Without saying a word, I stepped back and quickly went back to camp, keeping my eyes on the ground.

"Tilly, wait!" cried out Fili, but I kept on walking, frowning at how stupid I'd been.

Gandalf who was smiling at something that Dori was saying, caught my pale face and instantly stopped Dori for a second and called out to me. I turned and faced him. He ushered me to come to him and I unwillingly did.

"Child, are you alright, you look awfully pale?"

I realised that Thorin was now watching me and that made me feel even more mortified to what had recently transpired.

"I, um, just feel a little sick." I whispered.

Which was partly the truth. I knew Thorin would be angry to what I had done, even though in fairness, I was just helping Fili out. I close my eyes momentarily imagining Thorin's anger at me and I inwardly flinch.

"I have something to settle your stomach," replied Gandalf "would you like it?"

I nodded and watch Gandalf delve in his bag and pull out a green leaf, handing it over to me.

_'Great, another bloody leaf!' I thought bitterly to myself._

"It is best that you eat it as it is." instructed Gandalf.

I just nod and hesitantly brought the leaf to my lips, before popping it inside my mouth. I began chewing and the taste of the leaf was very minty which was quite pleasant. Gandalf continued to watch me as I slowly swallow the remains of the leaf in my mouth.

"Go and lie down. You will feel much better in the morning." smiled Gandalf.

_'I doubt that very much.'_ I thought, as I graced Gandalf with a smile before walking towards my bedroll.

I deliberately moved my bedroll away from the others. I knew pretty soon that Kili would tell Thorin about what had happened and I was petrified to what Thorin would say or do. I was not looking forward to getting up in the morning that was for sure.

o0o

We were now on our way once more. I deliberately stayed at the back, away from Fili and Kili. I was most surprised when Thorin himself woke me up this morning and I remember flinching at him. All he had said was, that it was time to leave, before retreating. I did notice him look back at me with a concerned look on his face.

"Are you alright Tilly?" asked Bilbo, who was riding next to me as was Bofur.

I just nod my head, not saying a word. This caused Fili to turn his head and gaze at me, though I refused to acknowledge him. If I had however, I would have seen the tender way he was watching me.

"Do you still feel ill?" asked Bilbo, looking over at me "You still look pale. Shall I ask Gandalf to give you one of those leafs?"

I shook my head.

_'What is it with leafs, all of a sudden?' _I thought to myself, frowning somewhat.

"Maybe a song would lift your spirits," smiled Bofur "we have yet to hear you sing."

I graced Bofur with a weak smile, unaware that Thorin was now looking our way.

"Maybe later. I'm not really in the mood."

"I'll hold you to it, lass." grinned Bofur

"Tilly, ride up front." shouted Thorin and I instinctively gulped before riding Rose upfront.

I spotted Kili staring at me who then averted his eyes as I pasted him. I was more concerned to what Thorin wanted, than what Kili was up to next. Riding up to Thorin, who was a little ahead from everyone, he slowed his pony as Rose and I came towards him.

"You've been very quiet today, Tilly," began Thorin, after a while of silence "What's really on your mind?"

I glance at him, before dropping my gaze to the mane on Rose's neck.

"Just tired." I lied, now refusing to look up once more.

"Tilly, normally you have a lot to say, to which I have to ask you to quieten down," I felt my cheeks go crimsom a little, as I knew this to be true "You have not spoken much today and I don't believe that I'm about to say this, but, I miss your banter."

I look at him with a shocked expression, he is observing me, though I don't say anything.

"Has someone upset you?"

I shake my head.

"No, no one has upset me." I reply quietly.

Thorin frown and takes a deep breath.

"Maybe Tilly is still under the weather," remarked Gandalf, who had clearly eavesdropped in this strange conversation.

"Perhaps," replied Thorin "but I don't think that is the problem here."

"No, perhaps you are right, Thorin." replied Gandalf.

I turn my head, looking at Gandalf who graced me with a smile. As I return my attention back to the front, I caught sight of Fili who was watching me back. He too graced me with a smile but I quickly averted my eyes and look ahead, unaware that Gandalf had seen everything between us.

o0o

While everyone was relaxing by the fire, I sat away from them, feigning that I was tired and wanted to get to sleep. From time to time, I kept catching Fili watching me, but I quickly look away again. Deciding that sleep was the best option, I unrolled my bedroll on the ground, I noticed Thorin beckon Kili and I suddenly felt sick to my stomach.

Lying down, I deliberately turned my back on the company and closed my eyes, willing sleep to come. Only things had a habit of changing that.

"You did what?"

My eyes opened as I heard Thorin's loud voice. He sounded livid. I refused to glance at him to see what was happening.

"It was just a joke Uncle, nothing more." I heard Kili's voice and I inwardly flinch, knowing where this was now heading.

"I did tell him off," I heard Fili's voice "seeing Tilly's face, was heartbreaking."

"Oh come on," Kili shouted, causing me to block my ears with my hands "it was just a joke! No real harm was done."

"A joke is one thing Kili, but when it upsets one of our companions, it affects all of us!" shouted Thorin "Now I finally understand why Tilly is so downcast. I really do think you-,"

I had heard enough and got up and headed towards the ponies that were a little further up. I gently stroke the pony that was nearest to me, which turned out to be Myrtle, Bilbo's pony, wondering what would happen now?

"Tilly."

I knew that voice so I didn't turn around.

"Tilly, could we please talk?"

Fili placed his hand on my shoulder and tried turning me around, but I was adamant in not allowing him the chance to see how he was affecting me.

"I can not bare to see you like this," whispered Fili, his hand still on my shoulder "so quiet and withdrawn. Please, look at me."

I don't say anything. I heard him sigh before he tried turning me around again.

"Please don't." I said, very softly.

"Tilly," Fili sighed again before continuing "What Kili did was mean and I wish I could have stopped him sooner. He may be my brother but honestly, Kili has always acted like this."

I move my head a little, processing his words.

"Kili is right about our hair customs though."

I swallowed hard and returned my attention on Myrtle, only Fili managed to turn me around. I could feel his eyes search my face, but I refuse to acknowledge him. Rising his hand, Fili gently placed his fingers under my chin, forcing me to face him.

"It is a dwarvish custom for the one you love to braid hair." carried on Fili, his eyes never left mine, as his left arm wrapped around my middle, holding me tight against him.

I frowned, knowing that was not what happened.

"I wasn't even braiding your hair," I scolded him, "all I did was take the leafs that were in your hair."

I tried to break free from his grasp only Fili was having none of that though and he held onto me tighter

"Let go of me!" I demanded, trying desperately to break free.

"No, not until you hear what I have to say."

"I'm not interested."

"Tilly, when you touched my hair, I-,"

"What's going on here?" came a voice behind me.

Turning my head, there stood Thorin with his arms around his waist, watching the pair of of us with slight amusement etched on his face.

"Nothing," I squeaked, finally managing to break free from Fili's hold on me "just stroking Myrtle here."

"That's not what I saw," Thorin smirked "the food is ready."

I watch Thorin carefully and I was wondering if he was about to have a talk to me regarding dwarvish customs. He arched his right eyebrow, but said nothing. I took this as a sign to make my retreat.

~~Fili's POV~~

I watch Tilly leave and I felt my heart shatter a little more. Will nothing get sorted? Uncle turned his attention to me and I give him a sheepish smile, hoping he couldn't see how I was uncomfortable at this very second.

"Well?" Uncle finally asked, I frown not understanding. "Do you or don't you?"

"I don't think I follow." I reply to him.

Uncle groaned and stepped a little closer to me.

"Do you have feelings for our fair maiden?"

I look at my boots, feeling my cheeks go slightly red. I slowly nod my head saying,

"With all my heart."

"And Tilly has no idea?"

I look at Tilly, who was now sitting between Dwalin and Bofur, before returning my gaze to my Uncle.

"I was about to tell her when...,"

"Go on?"

"Umm, well you see...,"

"Yes."

"You appeared." I mumbled.

Uncle's eyes went wide and surprised me by opening his mouth a little, looking a little shocked. He quickly regained himself and turned slightly, looking at who we were talking about.

"Just a suggestion Fili, maybe you should just be yourself," began Uncle, returning his gaze on me "She did look a little uncomfortable when you held her."

"She was about to run away." I protested.

"Fili, no one likes a death hug. Treat her with respect."

Uncle then turned around and started walking back to the camp.

"By the way, you have my blessing." I heard Uncle say and despite myself, I smiled.

Glancing back at Tilly, I had to tell her how I truly felt about her, without any interruptions. Question was, how was I going to get her on her own this time? I thought about that, as I slowly headed back.

o0o

~~Tilly's POV~~

All throughout dinner, I felt Fili's gaze on me but again, I refuse to glance back at him. Bofur was currently playing his flute and it had a calming effect on me and I momentarily closed my eyes, until I felt someone prod my arm.

Opening my eyes, I saw Bofur grin down at me and I wondered what he wanted.

"Lass, will you sing to us."

I blinked several times, then frowned at him.

"Oh come, we have yet to hear you sing," carried on Bofur and I heard many others also mumbling their agreement "please?"

I knew that if I said no, he would keep asking. So I took a deep breath and nodded. Bofur grinned as I stood up near the fire, wondering what song I could sing to them. Remembering many songs from earth, there was one that my mother had always adored, so I decided to sing that.

Taking another deep breath, I started singing, praying my voice was good enough for the company.

_"To dream the impossible dream_  
_To fight the unbeatable foe_  
_To bear with unbearable sorrow_  
_To run where the brave dare not go_

_To right the unrightable wrong_  
_To love pure and chaste from afar_  
_To try when your arms are too weary_  
_To reach the unreachable star_

_This is my quest_  
_To follow that star_  
_No matter how hopeless_  
_No matter how far_

_To fight for the right_  
_Without question or pause_  
_To be willing to march into hell_  
_For a heavenly cause_

_And I know if I'll only be true _  
_To this glorious quest_  
_That my heart will lie peaceful and calm_  
_When I'm laid to my rest_

_And the world will be better for this_  
_That one man, scorned and covered with scars_  
_Still strove with his last ounce of courage_  
_To reach the unreachable star."_

As I finished the song, I realised it was very quiet and I look at each of them in turn, seeing started wide eyes watch me back. I suddenly felt a little self conscious and feigned a yawn to show them that it was time for bed.

"Right, I think I'll go to sleep now."

"That was an interesting song," remarked Gandalf "care to explain what the meaning was?"

Looking at the ground, I think of how I could explain this without sounding like an idiot.

"I-It's from a musical." I began.

"What's a musical?" asked Nori, staring back at me with a smile on his face.

"A musical is where you sing, instead of speaking your words," I informed him, gracing him with a warm smile "The musical is called 'Man From La Mancha' and its about a man named Don Quixote."

For the next half hour or so, I tell them everything about Don Quixote. When I had finished, many of the company were talking among themselves and yet again, I caught Fili watching me.

"Tilly," Thorin walked up to me and I acknowledge him with a smile "could you clean up the bowls before you head to your bedroll?"

"Sure." I reply and started picking up the bowls that were near the lit fire.

"Thank you." I heard Thorin say as I walked towards the lake that was nearby.

~~Fili's POV~~

While everyone was content, I was feeling down, especially since Tilly still refuses to acknowledge me. I did enjoy the story she told us. The way her face lightened up as she explained Don Quixote's love from the woman Dulcinea, even if it was one sided and it got me thinking of myself and Tilly.

When I first saw her enter Bag End with Gandalf, I knew I was instantly smitten with her. The way she helped Bilbo when he fainted proved that she was a caring person. I was surprised when Uncle never uttered a word when Gandalf informed him that Tilly would be accompanying us and I remembered smiling at that.

Though she did keep to herself regarding her past, she was very vocal when many discussion took place. So vocal in fact, that Uncle had to ask her to quieten down a little. Now though, since she took the leafs out of my hair, she has barely said a word and I glance at Kili, knowing it was his fault that this has happened.

"Fili," I turn my head and glance at Uncle "here is a bowl Tilly forgot to pick up, could you-,"

"Of course Uncle." I cut in, grabbing hold of the bowl.

I quickly went in the direction Tilly headed, feeling a little nervous to what awaited me.

~~Thorin's POV~~

"You don't show it," I heard Gandalf say, as he walked up to me smoking his pipe "but I always knew you were a secret matchmaker."

I rolled my eyes.

"I have no idea on what you are talking about." I reply, not looking at the wizard.

"Ah, of course," chuckled Gandalf "I must have got it wrong then."

I didn't say anything as I watch Fili run towards the lake. A small smile appears on my face, hoping he tells her how he really feels about her. That way, Tilly will soon be back to her normal self once more.

o0o

~~Tilly's POV~~

While washing the bowls, I quietly savour the silence. It was quite nice and I found myself relaxing, that was until I heard a twig snap, breaking the moment. I turned my head and saw Fili heading towards me. He was holding onto something, but I return my attention to the lake, pulling the bowl that was under water back up to the surface.

"Tilly."

Fili knelt down next to me and there was a silence between us. Taking another bowl, I dunked the bowl in the cool water. All the while, I could feel Fili watching me again and I try to ignore it, but it was proving difficult.

Fili startled me by placing his hand in the water and gently taking hold of my hand, raising it towards his lips. I watch in stunned silence as he tenerly kissed my palm.

"W-What are you doing?" I finally ask him.

I glance at Fili noticing him watching me intently.

"Something that I should have done a lot sooner."

"Well don't!" I exclaimed, trying to break free from him.

"Tilly, I'm trying to express my fee-,"

"This is all one big joke to you and your brother, isn't it?" I interrupted him, finally managing to free my hand "First with the hair customs, now this. Well, this joke won't work on me."

I quickly grabbed the clean bowls and got up, leaving Fili in silence. I had no idea what he was trying to do but, I bet Kili was nearby ready to jump out and start mouthing off again.

I began walking back to the camp, looking at the bushes for any hint of Kili nearby. Suddenly I was spun around, causing all the bowls to drop out of my hands. Before I could tell Fili off, he quickly cupped my cheeks and leaned near me to kiss me.

It took me a few seconds for my brain to register that Fili was kissing me. At first I tried to break free which caused Fili to let go of my cheek and place his arm around my waist. He was persistent, I grant him that but slowly, I found myself responding back.

When Fili realised that I was cooperating, I heard him moan as I found myself wrapping my arms around his neck. He gently sucked on my bottom lip, as if he was asking me for permision to proceed. I grant him permission, feeling his tongue enter my mouth.

Fili's arm around my waist starts trailing up and down my back, as the kiss deepened. I don't know how long we were like that, but for once I didn't care. With great reluctance, I broke the kiss and I nearly laughed when Fili tried to kiss me again.

"What are you up too?" I asked him.

"Trying to kiss the lady I love." Fili replied, startling me.

"I-um, what?"

Fili gave me a lopsided grin.

"You heard me. I love you," He whispered, stealing another kiss from me "have done since I first saw you, Tilly."

"That was over a month ago."

"Aye, I know and I wanted to tell you how I felt, but things kept getting in the way."

I didn't say anything, I was too shocked with what Fili had just said.

"This isn't a joke is it?" I asked him.

The way he was looking at me, told me otherwise, but I had to know.

"Tilly," Fili pressed his forehead on mine "you mean everything to me. I know I'm not good at expressing my feelings, but what I feel for you, comes from my heart. There is no joke about that. You mean _so much more _than reclaiming Erebor."

"Fili, you can't say that."

"It is the truth. It is Uncle Thorin's idea to reclaim Erebor."

"Only because Gandalf-,"

Fili shut me up by kissing me again and for the first time, I felt like the weight was finally lifting from around my shoulders. As it all slotted into place at the way, Fili was always there for me, watching me. I broke the kiss again, hearing a groan from Fili I whispered,

"I love you too."

Fili's smile was contagious and I found myself smiling back at him.

"You have to help re-clean the bowls you knocked out of my hands." I informed him.

"That seems fair," grinned Fili as he finally let go of me as I bent down retrieving the bowls on the ground."then perhaps I could tell you about all the dwarvish customs that you need to learn, before we marry."

I shot back up, wide eyed.

"I beg your pardon?"

Did I hear right? I continue watching him as he stepped closer to me.

"Relax Tilly, I was joking," chuckled Fili, "let's re-clean these bowls or we will never hear the end of Uncle Thorin's rants."

~~Fili's POV~~

I help Tilly pick up the bowls and we both headed back towards the lake. Looking at her as she kneeled down, I sighed in relief, knowing that she felt the same about me. When I spoke of marriage, I wasn't really joking. I did want her as my wife. I vowed to ask her again, when we finally reclaim Erebor. Until then, I would be happy to have her by my side.

"Stop day dreaming and help me out here." exclaimed Tilly.

I nod my head and knelt besides her, finally content that she would be back to normal. I had hated seeing her so quiet and I hope that I will never see that side to her again. We ended up staying by the lake for a long time, with my arms around her. So long in fact, that Gandalf had to wake us both up the following day.

"Everyone wants their breakfast but there isn't any bowls," He informs us both "could we have the bowls back please?"

"Oh my." I heard Tilly say as she frantically handed the clean bowls to him.

"Thank you Tilly." smirked Gandalf, walking off.

"Well, that was embarrassing." mumbled Tilly placing her hand on her forehead.

I laughed, pulling her back to me.

"At least we will be embarrassed together this time." I murmured in her ear.

"True." was all Tilly said, as she wrapped her arms around my torso.

For a while we just stayed like that, watching the sun rise until we knew we had to get a move on, before Uncle shouted at us. We walked back to camp, hand in hand and I caught Kili's smile.

I knew it." chuckled Kili catching a bag of money that Dwalin had thrown.

When we saw Uncle staring at us, I faintly saw his smile and I smile back, knowing it was him that made me try again in telling Tilly how I truly felt about her. I had no idea that Uncle was a romantic, but I knew he would only deny that if I asked him. I gently squeeze Tilly's hand as we walk towards the middle of the camp now as a couple.

**A/N The Impossible Dream is taken from the musical Man Of La Mancha.**


End file.
